The House of Mirth Book 1 Chapters 13-14

In chapter 13, of The House of Mirth by Edith Wharton, Lily is left with two notes, one from Lawrence Selden, and one from Judy Trenor. Lily believes that Lawrence wants to mary her, which she does not want. I don't understand why Lily still doesn't accept that what she truly wants is to mary Selden. She focuses so much on wealth, that she maintains to look past her true happiness. In the note from Judy, she is told to meet at the Trenor house hold. She does, but is met by Mr Trenor. I was pretty surprised when Mr. Trenor held Lily in his house. It seemed as if the situation had gotten to the point that it would end in sexual assault, but at the last moment, Trenor realizes what he is doing and tells Lily to leave. This leaves Lily pretty shaken up. I honestly didn't really understand the beginning of chapter 14, especially the whole "Alone with her cousin's kiss" (Wharton 131). I didn't really understand this quote at all. We go from Selden talking to Van Alstyne, to a cousin's kiss. So, anyway, after that, Lilly goes to Gerty's house, to be consoled over what happened. Lily does seem to realize at this point that her deep need for money is shameful. She seems as if she may be moving away from the money oriented person she is, to become a more grounded person.